Community Conversation - Humility

The following is part of DougCo Collective’s “Community Conversations” and was written by a Douglas County community member (parent, student, teacher/staff or community member).  The intent of “Community Conversations” is to give members of the Douglas County community an opportunity to contribute to the larger DCSD conversation with their lived experiences and perspectives.

Estimated Read Time: 3 minutes

We are all humans. 

We all have bones in our bodies. 

We all want to be seen and heard. 

We all don’t know everything. 

We all make mistakes. 

We can all learn something new. 

We all have a narrative. 

That’s a good amount we all have in common. 

What if we practiced humility?  

This practice is important when working collectively to move in a positive direction as a society. 

We must understand that we don’t know everything, that we will get things wrong, that we will need to do some unlearning. These things don’t make us weak or lesser. Acknowledging our ignorance and recognizing our privilege are wise places to start when working toward our collective greatest good.  

There is a hierarchy that has been in place in this country for hundreds of years. It started with the genocide and forced removal of Indigenous Peoples. Today there continues to be an upholding and defending of the current hierarchy, which has whiteness (a social construct), able-bodied, and cisgender at the top. 

If we are going to make progress toward dismantling the systemic racism, homophobia and inequities that exist in our society, we must confront these inequities, starting with some self-evaluation.  

Instead of wasting time defending ourselves, what if we took ownership, checked our egos, and spent our energy working to educate ourselves about those who have been oppressed for hundreds of years and then aimed our energy at dismantling oppression? 

A note to white-identifying (socially-constructed) people: if we continue to stay stuck in our guilt and lack of ownership, then our society will continue to perpetuate systemic inequities. 

If hearing “white supremacy” makes you uncomfortable, get curious about why this is so. 

If being told you have white privilege makes you defensive, address the reason for your anger. 

If someone calls you racist or homophobic, consider that you likely did or said something racist or homophobic and do some self-reflection.

What if instead of ignorance and arrogance, we chose humility and wisdom? If you are leaning in and getting uncomfortable, GOOD! This is hard and necessary work. If not, why not? 

Beverly Daniel Tatum, Ph.D. states, “It is not our fault that our thinking has been shaped by stereotypes, distortions and omissions as we grew up. However, we have a responsibility. Each of us needs to take a look at our behavior. Am I perpetuating and reinforcing the negative messages that exist in our society, or am I challenging them? Am I acknowledging and examining my own prejudices?” Or are we comfortable maintaining the status quo? 

We didn’t choose the circumstances of our birth, however, we do choose whether or not we take responsibility for our own ignorance, inaction, and contributions to oppression. 

“It’s difficult to understand inclusion unless you’ve been excluded,” says Billie Jean King. What if we tried to understand? What if we listened more?  

Are you willing to have humility in order to help interrupt the cycle of oppression we currently perpetuate, intentionally or not? Are you willing to unlearn and then lean into the discomfort of new learning? 

It’s a process. It’s a practice. It won’t be perfect but it can only get better if we practice humility and keep showing up in any way we can against oppression and inequity. 

Suggested reading:  

Tears We Cannot Stop: A Sermon to White America by Michael Eric Dyson   

Caste: The Origins of Our Discontents by Isabel Wilkerson   

The Fire Next Time by James Baldwin 

So You Want to Talk about Race by Ijeoma Oluo